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| My first time |
| Friday, October 19, 2007 |
Let me set your expectations straight. No need to think you are going to have a dig at me. Yes, somebody did have a dig on me.And this is to supposedly deal with it.
Tired of swollen gums , I had my first visit to the dentist.Hey, guess what is common about TV, love and dentist.Simply put,"you can run, you can hide but you can't escape".
There are these Homeopathic doctors who will test your presence not only with seemingly irrelevant question but extremely long healing period,Ayurvedic doctors probably the final destination for the hopeless ones,allopathy- the quick fixers and the Dentists- the feared entities??
Now did i classify again?Thats what is called as working on your strengths...
Anyways, so the tryst started this way..
I climbed up anticipatingly towards the clinic, having read the female name inscribed.Mind you it was more of anticipation than hope. It's usually husband & wife doc couple who opens up a clinic. And i didn't want to waste to face the husband this time for obvious reasons.
As i was removing my dusty shoes at the doorstep,I overheard this dialogue --
"Is this the way to remove teeth. I almost lost consciuosness coz of the excruciating pain" .. A female voice echoed.
"You people dont know anything and open up clinics everywhere...O my buttons.. Will i ever able to east even?" despondence and anger homogenised in her voice.
I slowly started reversing my process,pulling up the socks all over again-feeling unsure if I should actually venture in.
Suddenly, I saw one middle-aged woman coming out of the chamber that looked like a mini-Operation theatre.She had her face covered with her hand as if cupping a decoupled part of the face that can drop anytime.. and behind her was the dentist whose appearance was no less tahn predator, face masked, gloves in hand, 2-3 instruments which looked like fork and knife at first sight.
I caught her attention pretty quickly and sensing a possible loss of customer, she removed her mask.:-) and politely said. " Good evening Sir, This is all done. Could you jus wait for a couple of minute.Please take your seat."
She offered a place where she can have an eye on me.
I sat and mulled over fleeing from the place...Wont it be too demoralizing for the doc? Wont it be cowardice on my behalf? My state of conflict and dilemma was snapped by a call for my name. I gathered myself and sat against the dentist.
She asked to me to get into the OT type chamber.I went ahead sniffing whether my socks outside are stinking enough to spread the odour inside the clinic. It was, i guess.
I prayed in my mind.Please dont ask me to keep my socks clean.I will wash it today. I made a solemn promise.
I was half laid on a pushback chair and she asked me to open my mouth. I followed obediently.She turned back and inserted a lot of arrows, knives, fork,mirror inside my small mouth.Yes it was not paining but the apprehension of pain is more painful than the actual pain, what the heck I am penning now.
Her face slowly came too close for my comfort. i just closed my eyes and let myself think about the dimensional modeling,cardinality and the entity relationships. The irony of the situation was, for me it was so awkward and for any other person who looks at the posture it would have been so romatic.
Anyways, she asked me to open up my eyes,, as if i were a newly wed Indian bride. I obeyed and she started showing me effects of all the bad eating& smoking habits i have cultivated. Verdict:In total 7 cavities and infection in gums. "You are going to be toothless in 2 years, if you dont attend to this. Shall i clean it up?" She asked. I just nodded in dismay.
She came up with a bench-vice kind of instrument which kept my face opened up and then took a driller and a hack saw all swithced on and raring to plough my pretty face.Pictures of instruments in mechanical engg workshops floated around me. These instruments ,, oh.. god.. Within a split second, there were all inside me.. drilling, scrubbing, woossh,, my teeth are not rusted iron which you can clean up with a sand paper..
Realising i can do nothing in this bonded position i decided to go back to the database architectural thoughts. Half an hour, my travails finally ended.
As i walked out slowly, i thought why people uproot their teeth. ... because they dont want it the second time......Labels: Funny Sides of Events, Humor |
posted by Dheeraj @ 5:41 AM   |
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| Talking Kishore-The Lunatic way |
| Thursday, October 11, 2007 |
 August 4, 1929-October 13, 1987 THE LUNATIC ASYLUM- AS You talked..
BEWARE OF KISHORE- AS You put on the ...
Kishore Kumar is said to have been paranoid about not being paid. During recordings, he would begin singing only after his secretary confirmed that the producer had made the payment. Once, when he discovered that his dues hadn't been fully paid, he landed up for shooting with make-up on only one side of his face. When the director questioned him, he replied "Aadha paisa to aadha make-up." (Half make-up for half payment). On the sets of Bhai Bhai, Kishore Kumar refused to act because the director M V Raman owed him five thousand rupees. His brother Ashok Kumar persuaded him to do the scene. But, when the shooting started, he walked across the floor and, each time he walked a few places, he said, "Paanch Hazzar Rupaiya," (five thousand rupees) and did a summersault. After he reached the end of the floor, he went out of the studio, jumped into his car, and ordered his driver Abdul to drive away.
On another occasion, when the producer R. C. Talwar did not pay his dues in spite of repeated reminders, Kishore Kumar turned up at Talwar's residence one morning and started shouting "Hey Talwar, de de mere aath hazaar" ("Hey Talwar, give me my eight thousand"). He did this every morning for a few days, until Talwar paid him.
The film Anand (1971) was originally supposed to star Kishore Kumar and Mehmood in the lead roles. One of the producers of the film, N.C. Sippy, had earlier served as Mehmood's production manager. Hrishikesh Mukherjee, the director of the film, was asked to meet Kishore Kumar to discuss the project. However, when he went to Kishore Kumar's house, he was driven away by the gatekeeper due to a misunderstanding. Kishore Kumar (himself a Bengali) had done a stage show organized by another Bengali man, and he was involved in a fight with this man over money matters. He had instructed his gatekeeper to drive away this "Bengali", if he ever visited the house. When Hrishikesh Mukherjee (another Bengali) went to Kishore Kumar's house, the gatekeeper drove him away, mistaking him for the "Bengali" that Kishore Kumar had asked him to drive away. The incident hurt Hrishikesh Mukherjee so much, that he decided not to work with Kishore Kumar. Consequently, Mehmood had to leave the film as well, and new actors (Rajesh Khanna and Amitabh Bachchan) were signed up for the film.
In spite of his "no money, no work" principle, sometimes Kishore Kumar recorded for free even when the producers were willing to pay. He recorded for free, for some films produced by Rajesh Khanna and Danny Denzongpa. On one occasion, Kishore Kumar helped actor-turned-producer Bipin Gupta, by giving him Rs. 20,000 for the film Dal Mein Kala (1964). When the little-known actor Arun Kumar Mukherjee died, Kishore Kumar regularly sent money to his family in Bhagalpur. Mukherjee was one of the first persons to appreciate Kishore's singing talent.
Many journalists and writers have written about Kishore Kumar's seemingly eccentric behavior. Kishore Kumar had put a "Beware of Kishore" sign at the door of his Warden Road flat, where he stayed for some time while his bungalow was being done up. Once, the producer-director H. S. Rawail, who owed him some money, visited his flat to pay the dues. Kishore Kumar took the money, and when Rawail offered to shake hands with him, he reportedly put Rawail's hand in his mouth, bit it, and asked "Didn’t you see the sign?". Rawail laughed off the incident and left quickly. Once, when a reporter made a comment about how lonely he must be, Kishore Kumar took her to his garden. He then named some of the trees in his garden, and introduced them to the reporter as his closest friends.
According to another reported incident, once Kishore Kumar was to record a song for the producer-director G. P. Sippy. As Sippy approached his bungalow, he saw Kishore going out in his car. Sippy pleaded him to stop his car, but Kishore only increased the speed of his car. Sippy chased him to Madh Island, where Kishore Kumar finally stopped his car near the ruined Madh Fort. When Sippy questioned his strange behavior, Kishore Kumar refused to recognize or talk to him and threatened to call police. Sipppy had to return. Next morning, Kishore Kumar reported for the recording. An angry Sippy questioned him about his behavior on the previous day. However, Kishore Kumar insisted that Sippy must have seen a dream, and claimed that he was in Khandwa on the previous day.
Kishore Kumar was also noted for defying producers and directors. Once, a producer went to court to get a decree that Kishore Kumar must follow the director's orders. As a consequence, Kishore Kumar obeyed the director to the letter. He refused to alight from his car until the director ordered him to do so. Once, after a car scene in Mumbai, he drove on till Khandala because the director forgot to say "Cut". In the 1960s, a financier called Kalidas Batvabbal, patently disgusted with Kishore Kumar's alleged lack of cooperation during the shooting of Half Ticket, gave him away to the income tax authorities. Kishore had to face a raid at his house. Later, Kishore invited Batvabbal home, tricked him by asking him to enter a cupboard for a "chat" and locked him inside. He unlocked Batvabbal after two hours and told him "Don’t ever come to my house again."
Source- wikipedia.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kishore_KumarLabels: pensive |
| posted by Dheeraj @ 7:36 PM |
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| The Classification #1| Where do you fit in? |
| Tuesday, October 9, 2007 |
The Classification #1
For most peple sans Einstein.. "They see things around and say why?" For me it is "I see things around and say CLASSIFY!!"
I have been self-declared SME when it comes to classification.I picked up this cue when I was classified as the most disturbing element of all the classes I attended , from school to college.My thought process on classification got further boosted when I got into the IT culture. My first experience was a classification on SMC criteria for a set of websites on a migration project. As a matter of fact -I classified most of them as "Simple" as I didn’t have to do the implementation or so I thought.
Well this classification is for our colleagues who inhabit the cab with us during the UC(usual and customary) late shifts.
Type1.Comfortably Numb
Traits: They dig a hole in the seat and make themselves so disintegrable from the cab that it seems the manufacturers actually supplemented the cab with him.You find the moving, click a picture-they have that alternative battery working for them.
Type2.Young and Restless
Traits: Despite all the ploughing they did the whole day , shouldering the chastisement of the superiors, these people out of the college are just too excited to let their limbs down. They will keep telling the stories to their fellow comrades ,story of college deeds ever so prominent.Ahh,,They will take their time to leap into "Type1".
Type3:The Time managers
Traits: These people have a stack of numbers where they need to dial and talk before deboarding the cab.Understandable, given the cramp schedules.Quite admirably, well-wishers also know the stock time when to call.Thats called as maximum utilization of time.
Type4: The Singers
Traits: Appearances getting lesser and lesser.Sometimes seen during pick-up times and last seen on 4-Aug-06 murmuring Kishore Kumar songs during the drops.It wasn’t me.Yes, the extinction is imminent….It leaves little to sing getting back home that late.
Type5:The indefatigables
Traits: Even after spending 15 hrs in the office, the brave soul is not out yet.Keeps on directing / confusing/counter arguing over his cell phone all the while. Wait, it’s a daily thing. You can feel his expertise with the kind of vocabulary and phrase they use.
Gimmi your ears.." The thing is with the given skill set..",,"If the Database was under maintenace,how.." "if you actually filter on the pending status..", "The deployment was actually done but the build.."..
People are left wondering if it is possible to do something in an hour that couldn’t be done for comple 15*7 efforts of 5 stalwarts. Battle continues.
Type6:The Bold and beautiful and the illusive.
Traits: This category never sits next to you.Always next to the "undeserving". The old saga continues where the most beautiful girl were either in senior /junior batch, different deptt, diff college, diff project.Ruthless luck.
Where do you fit in??
DheerajLabels: Office Travails |
| posted by Dheeraj @ 8:34 PM |
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| Partying ways... |
| Tuesday, October 2, 2007 |
2nd Oct - last day @ …….
With heavy heart, I announce the loss of my 1 year old companion.A friend in times of grief, gay and inertness. Always there- somewhere close to me, close to my head and heart.Yes, the loss is impregnable but exceptions can not be the rules. The time had arrived with abominable lull on the eve of Barristor MK Gandhi's birthday when the two soul mates parted their ways in a non- vibrant ,muted fashion.
I realised hardly a couple of minutes after the unfateful snap off. I had just lost 500gms of my gross weight when I stood up on my feet after deboarding the rick.
Yes, dear Nokia -6270 was going amiss.Yes, after spending a year of association, it decided to "move on". Yes, there is no hope. Gloom has decended from the dusty horizon and swept me off.Alas, you were in vibrating mode, couldnot hear my new Ramstein's ringtone. :(
I did everything an educated , well-mannered, vigilant IT professional could do. A police complaint right away, an email to vcops and mails to the few blore group ids with te IMEI number but deep inside me I know, this will never be their priority and it was my Prerogative to safeguard my prized possessions.
Dear Vampire(I will change your name to Angel, if you come back, kasam se),
I hope you are safe and safe in some one's company and not lying down all-dismantled, dishevelled on the road crushed by rolling wheels.I understand I have tested your patience with my incessant calls, continuous typing of stupid message. I will miss my snaps, songs,my memorabilia dear memory. More than it, I am missing all my invaluable contact numbers.Sorry Dad, I don’t remember even my kins number.Sad but a few n learnt though.
In due respect to your delicate features , I wont buy another 6270. Sweets, I am looking for a second hand Nokia 3310/3315. This distance is not bearable , can't sustain another jolt.
I will also buy one conventional pocket notebook from ferriwalla to store my numbers, ask my near-dear ones to gift me a separate camera, a separate ipod, a separate player. I know now, you were overloaded.
Thanks for being there, Miss you. May your electronic circuits keep catching the network wherever you are.
Yours
~DheerLabels: Funny Sides of Events |
| posted by Dheeraj @ 10:10 PM |
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